Saw an article the other day that started with this sentence:
If there’s one thing we need more of in America, it’s eight-pound hamburgers.
That’s something you don’t hear too often. There might’ve been a touch of sarcasm if you read in-between the lines (even though it’s only one line). Besides, who could even eat an 8-pound hamburger? Probably not even Adam Richman of Man v. Food fame.
What we do need is restaurants offering more options on burgers — like to include copious amounts of bacon, fried egg, various cheeses, ham, different sauces (BBQ, chipotle, cheese dip), etc. Actually, perhaps bacon should come standard on all burgers. Why wouldn’t you want bacon on your burger? [pause to venture deep in thought] I got nothing.
This is just another reminder that Buffet o’ Blog needs some venture funding to start our own restaurant.
When I was Christmas shopping last month, I saw some type of burger bomb sauce, which sounded intriguing, like maybe some chipotle-based sauce. (BTW, have you noticed that chipotle seemed to be the top food-related buzzword of 2011? But I digress…)
I looked at the ingredients, and noticed that the first 4 ingredients are mayo, pickles, ketchup, mustard. As we’ve discussed numerous times on the blog, pickles are not food, so they don’t belong in any sauce. (I can’t stand mustard, either, but will acknowledge it’s edible to some people.)
So maybe this sauce is marketed as a practical joke type gift, in that it will result in the destruction of your burger, from an edible point-of-view. I figured using the term “bomb” meant it would be the bomb, but obviously they meant it more literally.
Ironically, if someone had given me this sauce, I would probably blow it up… 🙂
Ironically, after publishing this week’s caption contest featuring Darth Vader and Ronald McDonald, I happened across an image of a Darth Vader burger. Apparently some restaurant in France has created a Darth Vader burger which has a black bun. It definitely looks evil! (I’m not sure what evil tastes like, and I don’t really want to find out.)
They also created a Jedi Burger, which looks lame. Are those marshmallows? And what’s that sauce? I may not want to know…
The restaurant says the black bun is just from a dye, that it should taste the same. It actually looks kinda cool, though it doesn’t look edible. Still, I’d try it, given the opportunity.
For those of you curious why this is happening now, it’s to promote the re-release of The Phantom Menace — this time in 3D. And if you noticed the spelling of Vador, apparently that’s how it’s spelled in France. I don’t know why it would change, but whatever.
A while back the Buffet o’ Blog staff visited a fairly new restaurant in town called David’s Burger. We make it a point to visit new restaurants of interest, and a place that specializes in burgers is definitely an interest! They even have stacks of fresh ground beef on display when you go in. They definitely emphasize that their meat is fresh.
All this place sells is burgers and fries, so that’s what we got. They initially forgot to put bacon on our burgers, but that was easily remedied, and they brought out 4 pieces of bacon for each burger, which is the right amount. The burgers were delicious — juicy / greasy, with the cheese melting, and plenty of meat. I wasn’t too crazy about the fries, but some people like them, so your results may vary.
On a subsequent visit with different guests, one member of my party forgot to order cheese. I informed the staff and they brought us a slice to put on. But this was no ordinary slice of cheese — it had been dipped in the grease, so it was already half melted. That’s a tasty way to melt the cheese, though not healthy at all.
Overall, we recommend it.
Once again it’s time for our next weekly caption contest. This week’s photo features a man eating a giant cheeseburger. And he’s wearing a helmet. Who knows why? (Hopefully you do.) Make up your best guess to explain this picture — or make a joke about it or even a pun (if you must) — and leave it in a comment.
(To see our other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)
Burger King is about to debut a New York Pizza Burger, which contains: four quarter-pound patties topped with pepperoni and mozzarella and smothered in marinara sauce — all on a sesame seed bun that spans nine-and-a-half inches. If you think about it, that’s like four Whoppers plus pizza toppings, all in one burger. (If you plan to eat one by yourself, you should stop reading now.) It adds up to 2,530 calories, 144 grams of fat (59 grams saturated) and 380 mg of cholesterol. (For reference, a Whopper is comparatively healthy, delivering 670 calories, 40 grams of fat (11 saturated), and 75 mg of cholesterol.) You probably know that those first statistics are extremely unhealthy, but to put them in context, nutritional guidelines say most people should consume no more than 2,500 calories, 65 grams of total fat, 20 grams of saturated fat, and 300 mg of cholesterol in an entire day.
One website called it a “fat bomb”. That could be a valid description. Another way to look at it is that you’re getting your whole day’s worth of food in one burger. 🙂
I think one of the best jobs ever would be a food critic. You go to restaurants, your company pays for it, and you try all kinds of interesting food, then review it. Unfortunately, most of us will never get that job, so I’m starting a series where we get to be a virtual food critic. I know, it’s not nearly the same, because you don’t get to eat the food. But it can still be fun. Plus, if we discover a new dish that sounds awesome, maybe we’ll try it at one of our next “Adventures in Eating” nights (also called “Buffet o’ Bacon”, though not necessarily limited to bacon). And maybe we’ll invite all the regular readers here to these events (as we have been discussing).
Here’s how this new series will work: I’ll post a picture of some dish, and then we discuss it. If that doesn’t sound interesting, give it a chance. I’ve been involved in numerous food-related discussions with the Buffet o’ Blog staff that were a lot of fun, and we’ve come up with many good ideas.
One limitation with these pictures is that there may not be a recipe included, so sometimes we will have to guess at the actual ingredients. But if we aren’t sure what it is, we can always make substitutions (like switching bacon for an unknown meat or replacing non-potato vegetables with cheese).
In your analysis of the featured food dish, you can rate it from 1 to 10 (or any comparable scale), you can specify which ingredients / sides should be removed as well as which ones should be added, and you can explain why a particular dish would be awesome or horrendous. And remember this is a humor site, so don’t get burdened down in seriousness. This is supposed to be fun. So don’t be afraid to get extreme or go way over the top in suggested improvements.
I’ll start this new series with something we’re all familiar with — a cheeseburger. But to me, something about this burger just isn’t quite right. What do you think about it, and what should be changed on it?
(The future entries will all be filed under the category of “food critic“.)