Tag Archives: donuts

Tour De Donut (The Donut Race)

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Speaking of National Doughnut Day, I just learned there is a Tour De Donut event.  You might be thinking it would be a great idea to have a donut-themed race but that this is probably just referencing some person or place named Donut.  That happens sometimes.  But in this case, there actually is a race involving the eating of donuts!

The Tour De Donut is an annual bicycle race held in Staunton, Illinois, plus a few other places.  It’s a 30-mile race, which is a good ways to ride if you aren’t in optimal fitness.  But there’s a unique twist to this race, which somewhat levels the playing field.  There are two pit stops in nearby towns during the race, and your total race time is reduced by five minutes for each donut you consume during those pit stops.

I can put away some donuts, so I could reduce my race time by a significant amount.  However, there is the issue that eating donuts may make you slower.  So you’ve got to strategize about it — if you eat 6 donuts, it saves you 30 minutes, but will it make you 30 minutes slower?  Of course, donuts also provide extra energy (which would be needed for most of us on a 30-mile ride).

I think this race would be fun to do, in the spring or fall.  Having it in the summer would be disoptimal for several reasons.

Obviously the idea can be expanded, too — how about a Tour De Bacon?  Sounds interesting to me!

There’s probably somebody reading this who is thinking something like “this is so unhealthy, I can’t believe you are promoting it!”  Yeah, well, it’s like this — most people are gonna eat donuts and bacon anyway, so if they will get outside and get a couple hours of exercise and fun, it’s better than nothing.  And they might even burn more calories than they consume.  That makes me wonder — how many miles do you have to ride to burn off the calories per bacon strip?  We could come up with a stat to determine the winner (or at least a secondary winner) — miles per bacon.  🙂  Mathematically that wouldn’t be good for eating the most bacon, but we can work on the formula.  I’m just making this up as I go.  🙂

Feel free to continue developing the idea.  As long as it involves eating donuts and/or bacon, count me in!

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National Doughnut Day

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It has come to my attention that today is National Doughnut Day.  It is the first Friday of June each year.  Given how many special holidays there already are, you might think the day was created solely because donuts are awesome.  While that is sufficient reason, it goes even deeper.  The holiday was started in 1938 to honor the tradition of the Salvation Army providing donuts to soldiers during World War I.

Some doughnut shops give away a free donut on this day, so that might be worth checking out.  Even the cheapest of donuts — typically a simple glazed one — is great.  And while you’re there, you might as well pick up a chocolate-filled donut.  (It still boggles my mind that Krispy Kreme doesn’t sell a chocolate-filled donut, which is the best kind!  It’s stupefying!  It’s inconceivable!)

In case you aren’t aware, Krispy Kreme stores that make the donuts will sometimes give away a free glazed donut fresh off the assembly line, and that alone might be worth the trip.  The donut almost melts in your mouth with warm, yummy goodness.  (It’s probably a good thing the closest one is 30 miles away for me, or I’d be there too often.)

BTW, if you are a grammar perfectionist who is about to leave a scathing comment about how my spelling of donut changed, realize I chose to use both spellings interchangeably.  It’s my prerogative.  (And it’s also a good strategy from a search engine perspective.)

There are a number of special days and holidays each month, which have been discussed here at Buffet o’ Blog.  For example, here’s the one for June.

caption contest, Stormtrooper with cookies

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This week’s caption contest features both desserts and Star Wars humor, so it’s bound to be good!  The photo is of an Imperial Stormtrooper carrying a tray of food, which looks to be some sort of cookies or donuts.  I’m not sure what the food is nor what is going on, but that’s okay, because you get to write the context.   If you think of something funny explaining what could be going on here, let us know in a comment.  Or even if it doesn’t explain the story but is funny, that’s fine.  Just keep it clean and make it funny.

(To see our other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)

funny pictures, episode 6

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Over the years, I’ve collected a number of funny pictures, and this series is where I share them with the world.   If you have any comments on any of them, you’re welcome to add it.

"I've got skills... I've got game..."

Uhh...

I probably shouldn't comment on this...

"Hey, Bubba, watch this!"

Donuts and bacon... that is something I can support!

"When I was your age, we used to have to pull cars to school with our faces, while being mocked and ridiculed, uphill both ways."

(To see the other posts of funny pictures, click on the “Funny Pictures” category in the sidebar.)

crack weenies and bacon candy

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Here at Buffet o’ Blog I often write about topics I find humorous, although sometimes the topic turns to food.  So when I found these videos that combine humor and food, I had to write about it.

There’s an online food show called “Worst Foods Hall of Shame”.  The basic premise is that the host tries unusual recipes that are sent in by readers.  As you might guess by the title, some of the concoctions are nasty.  But there are some that you’ve probably never heard of but will be tempted to make.  The episode linked below has one of each.

In this video the host, Shawn McKee, tries 3 reader-submitted recipes.  The first involves Chips Ahoy chocolate chip cookies topped with sliced cheese.  He says they’re okay but missing something, so he improvises and adds maple syrup.  The second recipe consists of chocolate cake donuts topped with can tuna (packed in oil).  That one sounds incredibly gross.  He tries it, and says, “It’s even worse than you’d think it would be.  Oily tuna on a chocolate donut?  Amazing… amazingly bad.”  His third recipe is called “crack weenies”, which are made from smokies and bacon, and it sounds good.  (Perhaps we’ll try that last one at a future Buffet o’ Bacon event.)

In that video, he references “bacon candy”.  If you’re still reading, I figure you’re interested, like I am.  So here’s that video.  (A short synopsis is candy made from butter and sugar, a gelatinous mix made from cottage cheese, Jello, and ranch dressing, and then bacon candy.  Only one of those am I interested in trying.)

If you are interested in our bacon experiments, here’s the link to our buffet o’ bacon and part 2.

a bag of donuts

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I’m about to tell you a strange story.  It’s one that you’ve never heard of.  You could say it’s quite obscure in most parts of the world.  I usually don’t tell tales such as this here, but today is an exception.  I guess you could say I’m just in a story-telling mood today.

Every year on December 12th (12/12), something unusual happens.  There’s a peculiar man who goes around the tri-state area bringing holiday cheer with food.   Nobody knows his real name, but they call him Bag O’Donuts.  This is his moniker because he carries a magical bag of donuts (doughnuts) on this special day / holiday.

bag-of-donutsThis special bag has within it every kind of donut — any kind you can imagine.  And the donuts are always fresh, similar to the ones you get off the line at Krispy Kreme where they almost melt in your mouth.  But this magical bag works only one day per year, making it a most special day for all who love donuts.

Mr. Bag O. Donuts has done this every year for a while now, establishing a tradition you could say, except one particular year, and that was when a man named Fab stole the magical bag of donuts.  Fab and Mr. Donuts were talking about the magical bag, how it worked, when Fab simply pulled the wool over Mr. Bag Donuts’ eyes (literally).  While Donut-Man struggled to unfleece himself, Fab escaped with the oft-coveted bag.  donutsFab hid in the pea patch, and ate donuts all night long.  He ate glazed, chocolate-filled, cream-filled, chocolate-covered, cream sticks, custard donuts, strawberry shortcakes, twists, etc. — all he could imagine.   It was better than a wagon full of pancakes!  He ate and ate, until he could eat no more.  In fact, he ate so many donuts that he began to look like one!

A search party eventually found Fab in the pea patch, asleep with the bag at his side and donuts in each hand.  But it was too late for Mr. Doughnuts to make his run — the clock had struck midnight, thus the bag’s special powers went dormant, and many people suffered free donut withdrawals.  It was truly tragic.

Now Baggy Donuts won’t bring donuts to Fab anymore, although I hear they are on talking terms now.  Fab denies the incident ever happened, but don’t believe him.  Rumor has it that sometimes on Dec. 12, late at night, you can still find Fab wandering around the pea patch, longing for the endless donuts once again.   Some say he has a donut-shaped hole in his soul, leaving him restless and endlessly hungry.

Now you know… the rest of the story.

the special days of September, pt 2

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I’m going to continue my analysis of the special days of September.   In this post I’ll be examining the holidays on individual days.

  • 1 Labor Day (first Monday of month) — Ironically, on a day all about labor, you get off work.   So that’s kinda weird, but I am definitely NOT complaining!
  • 2 National Beheading Day — WHAT?!?   I’m definitely not participating on this holiday!   Who came up with this?   This sounds un-American!  (It also sounds like it’s bad for your health!)
  • 5 Be Late for Something Day — Okay, here’s a holiday I can support!  This won’t even take too much effort for me.  🙂  You even get to pick what you’re going to be late to.  (Ironically, I’m late in posting this series this month, but it’s not the 5th now.)
  • 5 Cheese Pizza Day — Here’s another American-sounding holiday.  Even if you prefer your pizza to be topped with lots of dead animals (meats), surely you can still appreciate the yummy goodness of a cheese pizza.
  • 6 Fight Procrastination Day — Is it a coincidence this is the day after “Be Late for Something Day”?  I’m not sure what to think about this day… I think I’ll ponder this later…
  • 6 Read a Book Day — A comic book would count — it even has “book” in the name of it.   Like discussed in the previous post on the special days of September, there are all kinds of books out there, something for everyone.  Of course, the best book to read is the Bible, because it will change your life.
  • 7 Neither Rain nor Snow Day — Was this invented by the Post Office?   Regardless, I can guarantee it’s not going to snow here on this day.   But rain would be likely, whether from afternoon summer thunderstorms or the remnants of hurricanes which pass through here after going through the Gulf of Mexico.  (I’m in Arkansas, if you didn’t know.)
  • 8 International Literacy Day — If you’re reading this, you’re already literate.   If someone can’t read, then they can’t enjoy the rambling goodness that is Buffet o’ Blog, so you should read this to them until they learn to read.
  • 8 Pardon Day — Today you should grant and request pardons freely.   So if you go up to someone and rip a loud fart, you just have to say, “Pardon me”, and they have to pardon you and not hold it against you.
  • 9 Teddy Bear Day — There have been several holidays already about teddy bears, like hugging them, taking them to work, and going on picnics with them.  So why do they get another holiday?   I figure if you still hang out with your teddy bear, you already know he’s special.  And if you’ve outgrown your teddy bears, all these holidays for them are superfluous.
  • 10 Swap Ideas Day — I reckon this is where I share an idea with you, and you share an idea with me.   I’ll go first.  When you have a job interview, eat a bunch of Oreos just before you go in, then smile a lot.  That way they’ll be staring at your teeth and not your resume.  🙂
  • 10 T.V. Dinner Day — On this day in 1954, the first TV dinner was sold (by Swanson).  Nowadays, the TV dinner aisle at your grocery store is probably running over with healthy, non-flavored microwave meals.   I’m not necessarily against healthy meals — some people enjoy them — but let’s not forget that you want to keep everyone happy, and the average American adult is overweight, so we don’t care about that healthy nonsense.
  • 11 Patriot Day — This is also known as World Trade Center Remembrance Day.   May we never forget…
  • 11 Make Your Bed Day — Making your bed is overrated.  (Can I get a witness?)   If nobody is going to see your bed but you (and your spouse), why bother making it every day?
  • 11 No News is Good News Day — I’ve heard this phrase before, but it’s not always true.  Besides, if this was true, you could just never watch or read the news, thus ensuring it would all be good.
  • 12 Chocolate Milk Shake Day — Of the smaller holidays (meaning the ones you don’t get off work for), this has to be one of the best ones.   Milkshakes are awesome!   And I’m partial to chocolate and/or cookies and creme varieties.  I also enjoy them with malt added.  On this day, all milkshakes should be half price, so people can enjoy them more.
  • 12 National Video Games Day — There was another of this day on July 8, but it wasn’t national.  I don’t know the difference, but I won’t complain that there’s two!  For those of you who don’t appreciate video games, you just haven’t found the right ones for you.  There’s something for everyone!
  • 13 Chinese Moon Festival (15th day of 8th Lunar month) — This is one of the biggest annual holidays in China.  People take off work on this day and watch the moon.   This holiday even goes back thousands of years (to when they worshiped the moon).  People also make and eat mooncakes on this day.
  • 13 Defy Superstition Day — I defy it every day.   I’m not superstitious at all.   In fact, it’s bad luck to be superstitious.
  • 13 Fortune Cookie Day — I’d like to learn to make my own fortune cookies, so I could put my own custom messages in it.  As you can imagine, it would be quite random.   Here’s a few examples: “If a scruffy-looking fellow who you’ve never seen before comes up and offers you a very strange-looking raisin muffin, it’s a good idea to decline, in this instance.”  Also, “Today is an excellent day to fly a kite shaped like a life-sized pterodactyl.   Try to get it to hover just outside someone’s office window.”   You get the idea…
  • 13 National Peanut Day — Peanuts are good in a variety of foods / dishes / candy.  Right now I’m thinking of chocolate-covered peanuts.
  • 13 Positive Thinking Day — Repeat after me: “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and people like me.”
  • 13 Uncle Sam Day — Uncle Sam is getting old.   He was born in 1813.  Actually, I haven’t heard from him in a while.   Is he still alive?
  • 13 Scooby Doo’s Birthday — The Scooby-Doo cartoons premiered in 1969.  Scooby and “those meddlin’ kids” solved a lot of mysteries.   Those original cartoons are classics.   The newer ones just aren’t the same.
  • 14 National Pet Memorial Day (second Sunday in September) — Hmm, a memorial day for your pets.   I don’t think this is necessary, but to each their own.
  • 14 National Cream-Filled Donut Day — I’m all about a chocolate-filled donut!   Mmm…

As is usual on these special days lists, this is getting long, so I’m going to finish the list in the next post.  Click here to search for the other posts on the special days of September.