This week’s caption contest features a man playing a guitar in what looks like a junkyard. But who knows, it could be his yard, or props for some crazy movie. He’s also wearing really weird outfit — is it a costume for something, or is that how he normally dresses? You get to decide. If you can figure anything out that’s funny, leave a comment for our enlightenment. ‘Cause I just don’t get it…
(To see our other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)
I don’t care anything about beer, but I saw this in the news and thought it was really, really weird. There’s a company called BrewDog that sells a beer called “The End of History”, and it’s supposedly the “strongest, most expensive and most shocking beer in the world.” (How’s that for a marketing slogan?)
It’s definitely shocking — it costs $765 a bottle, it’s 55 percent alcohol, and it’s served in a squirrel. (Yeah, you read that right.) It’s not a fake squirrel, either — it’s actual roadkill. You can also get it in weasel or hare bottles. They decided to wrap the bottles in dead animals to indicate how special the beer is, that it’s blending brewing, taxidermy, and “art”.
Their marketing ploy has people talking (obviously). I don’t know how much it will help sales… at $765 a bottle, that’s not an impulse buy nor a “let’s give this as a prank gift” purchase for most people.
As you would expect, using dead animals is controversial to some people. A director for Advocates for Animals said it is “degrading” for the animals. The brewing company said all the animals were roadkill collected at a taxidermist, so they were all dead anyway.
What do you think?
Overheard this at lunch today:
“How did poop even get on the ceiling?”
There are some unusual video games that get made every year. Most of the time, I understand — even if the game seems weird to me, at least the developers are using some creativity and trying something new. There needs to be more chance-taking in game publishing.
But I heard of a game that just blows my mind when I consider how generic it sounds. It’s called Forklift Truck Simulator. Below is a screenshot from the game, showing how action-packed this game will be.
Uhh… Maybe there’s something I’m missing. Let’s examine some of the press release about it:
Get behind the controls of a forklift truck in this highly detailed original simulator.
Your aim is to master the demanding range of tasks facing a forklift truck driver in every day scenarios. Load and unload Lorries and train carriages within a given time schedule or store goods in huge warehouses! …
To make the experience a bit more realistic you begin in a training mode to learn your controls and achieve your license in order to continue to the missions. There is also a “free play” mode which allows you to drive freely and choose where to go and what to do with the goods.
Robert Stallibrass of Excalibur Publishing says: “We are delighted to add Forklift Truck to our range of Simulators. The developers at Astragon have a great sense of detail and have worked hard to make this experience as realistic as possible.”
Again I say, uhh… I hope there’s a LOT I’m missing, for the sake of the people who put money into this project. The concept of “as realistic as possible” doesn’t seem like a selling point for me. I usually play video games so I can do things I can’t normally do in real life. (Granted, I don’t find myself driving forklifts on a regular basis, but that’s not high on my list of priorities.) If these forklifts don’t have weapons or power-ups, it doesn’t sound too fun.
The only hope I see for this game is the “free play” mode. If it allows you to get creative and/or go on a destructive rampage, there could be some fun involved. But if it’s “realistic” and restricted to work-life experiences, I can’t see it being worthwhile — unless you plan to become a professional forklift driver, but still, real life experience would be a lot better.
But to each their own…
New posts were in short supply last week with the extended holiday — there were a lot of Thanksgiving dinners to attend — but now things are back to normal. So let’s kick this week off with a caption contest, as is our custom.
This week’s photo is quite unusual. I really have no idea what’s going on here, except that a guy is standing in the middle of the road with his pants down and his shirt off. There are a lot of other people around, but at a distance. Since I have no context whatsoever for this picture, we’ll just have to make it up. That’s where you come in. Explain what could be going on here, whether realistically or not. Just make it funny, and keep it clean.
(To see the other caption contests, click on the “Say What?” category in the sidebar.)
One of the writers here recently mentioned the growing industry of butt facials, and then the article he referenced said men haven’t taken to it so far. That is completely understandable. But I recently read something similar to this which disturbs me. (Read on if you dare.)
In an article in TIME Magazine about not looking old on the job, they list some of the cosmetic surgeries common among men and women of the baby boomers generation. I can understand wanting to look younger, especially in tech fields typically dominated by people in their 20s and 30s. But wait ’til you read some of these. For men, the article lists things like tooth-tightening, neck tucks, and knee-tightening. That’s weird enough, but it gets even more crazy. The last item mentioned is a “butt lift and implant” — for men.
I’d never heard of such craziness, and I kinda wish I had never known. (If you feel the same way, well, too bad, because now you know.) The article explains why a man would want this: “Slacks can’t hide a saggy, deflated tush.” Whether true or not, I have to ask “WHO CARES?” Do men get less promotions or job offers because of their butts? I don’t think so. (And if there are instances where that is true, I wouldn’t want to work there anyway!)
The article explains the procedure: “Buttock lifts (up 660% in men from 2000 to 2006) involve surgically lifting baggy behinds; implants, a newer option, mean inserting silicone sacks.” I just have trouble believing any man would want butt implants… I don’t know… And guess what it costs… $4,500!
What is this world coming to?
Is it illegal to pass gas? Usually not, as far as I know, but a man named Jose Cruz found out otherwise. This week, in South Charleston, West Virginia, Cruz was arrested for driving under the influence (DUI). When police were trying to get his fingerprints back at the station, he passed gas on an officer. Here’s what was filed in the official police report:
During processing Ptlm. Cook was taking the defendant’s fingerprints while Ptlm. Parsons was typing data into the Intoximeters 5000 machine. Ptlm. Parsons was in a chair approx. 4-5 feet away from the fingerprinting station. The defendant scooted the 4 feet to Ptlm. Parsons, away from officer Cook, and lifted his leg and passed gas loudly on Ptlm. Parsons. Then defendant then fanned the air with his hand in front of his rear onto Ptlm. Parsons. The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Ptlm. Parsons.
Ironically, he next had to take the breath test, and he couldn’t give a sufficient sample because he was having trouble breathing.
For doing all that, they charged him with “battery on an officer” and “obstructing an officer”. I realize no one wants to be farted on, but is it really a criminal offense? Did the officer think it was chemical warfare? (Maybe it’s psychological warfare.) Two days later, police dropped the charges relating to his flatulence.
Although, now that I think about it, the police were just trying to maintain law and odor.